I made up a little disclaimer sign I'd like to perch on the self checkout stations. It reads:
Hi, my name is Sibyl. I have 16 personalities, and most of them are unpleasant. Your kid is the "unexpected item in the bagging area". Pay no attention to me as I am blind, deaf, and dumb. You'd never know if that I am a glorified scale, since there are no signs to indicate as such. I don't live in reality and haven't a clue as to whether you are stealing anything or not. Trust me.... no cashiers lost their jobs to me, since I obviously can't function without them! Please take your change and thank you for shopping at the Home Depot!