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Thread: Bye!

  1. #9
    Tropical Fish Enthusiast jimscott's Avatar
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    Sorry to see you go, Matt. Say hello to the Captain.

  2. #10
    zappafan's Avatar
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    Sorry to see you go. Take care.

  3. #11
    apple rings.. what more can i say? FlytrapGurl's Avatar
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    It's not that people feel like they HAVE to be here, it's that sometimes some people get so stressed out by the inward pressure to get back here and catch up with a debate or whatever where they are a main player in an argument so they know what's been said to them and what they need to clear up about themselves before 10 new pages appear overnight that they have to sort through (or ask for a detailed review of what was said, which you never actually get), and these people kinda like the idea of leaving and being free of any obligations and responsibilities to online debates/discussions (and you can't get rid of that pressure.. it's just there and it's not going to go away), but then again they don't leave, because there are too many people on here that have become exactly like friends to them, who they can't be in contact with except through here. And that's what's going on here. People get stressed by the pressure to keep up with debates and high activity, but they won't leave because they don't want to turn their backs on many people here.

    Just try to avoid posting topics bound to turn into near-flame-wars. That's all. And STOP LEAVING! It's your choice, but here's what happens... if people, especially old-time members, keep leaving every time a fight breaks out, TF will die. I've seen it happen on a forum I used to go to (and no, I didn't leave.. I was banned by a biased, Hitler-like admin). It was going GREAT the first couple of years into it, with few arguments, lots of old-time members and great fun. Then the amount of members got bigger and bigger and therefore there were more people to disaggree, therefore there were many fights. Then oversensitive people left every time there was a fight, and eventually the forum was nothing but a rare few old-time members, hundreds of newbies, fights everywhere, a regular war zone. Then most of the people left and it turned inactive, and then almost nobody came there anymore, and then it died. And that's exactly what will happen to TF if debates/fights keep breaking out and driving people away. I'm not against debates.. I'm fine with them. But many, many people are sensitive and will leave as soon as a fight breaks out, and they ARE leaving. Especially the newbies, because they joined during a time of forum turmoil, and the join not expecting so much turmoil, because they should have joined back when the forum was still healthy and thriving without many fights and gotten used to the fights over time, but they didn't, so they join at a time where the only people not leaving are the old-time members who are very used to the fights (which is why most of the old-time members take alot longer to scare off), but the newbies aren't, so they leave when a fight breaks out. I don't want to see TF armageddon happen. At this point and time, I'm seeing the first warning signs of TF armageddon.

    Your basic forum-armageddon timeline:

    Great, healthy activity and members > member count expands over time > more people, therfore more fights > old-time members leave, leaving newbies who don't yet know that the forum isn't a peaceful place > another fight breaks out and the newbies are scared off > more old-time members leave, along with herds of newbies > activity takes a nose-dive > suddenly only 2 or 3 people visit, maybe once or twice a month > forum armageddon.

    We can stop this from happening to TF if we'd just pay attention to what's happening and try to not post big debates witch WILL inevitably turn into war zones and cause people to leave. Also, we need to unite and become determined to ride it out and not leave the second a fight breaks out. If people keep leaving every time there's a petty little argument, TF will die, and I don't want to see that happen, and neither does most everybody else here.
    Liquid Plummer
    Warning: Do not reuse the bottle to store beverages.

  4. #12
    Moderator Schmoderator Fluorescent fluorite, England PlantAKiss's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by [b
    Quote[/b] ]it's that sometimes some people get so stressed out by the inward pressure to get back here and catch up with a debate or whatever where they are a main player in an argument
    First off...there should not BE any fighting. Its against the rules. Our No. 1 Rule is...BE NICE. That means RESPECTING other opinions **even if you don't AGREE with it**. Everyone is entitled to their opinions. There shouldn't be any arguing. An argument is entirely different than a discussion. People are free to discuss what they want. They are not free to argue. Arguing gets you nowhere. Intelligent discussion is an exchange of ideas, theories, thoughts, feelings, etc. It's not hurling insults or name calling or accusing.

    This is a PLANT FORUM. Its not a debate club. We want to have the general forum open to anything because its the "heart" of the forum. Its where the community gathers for friendship (if desired). Without the openness and commraderie here, we'd be just another GardenWeb.

    If anyone feels any "inward pressure" it is indeed just that--INWARD. No one here can control how someone feels if they CHOOSE to participate in a discussion that may be controversial.

    Its kinda like someone pinching themselves and then saying..."It hurts to be pinched, so I'm leaving." Just stop pinching yourself!

    This is a very simple issue and I can't for the life of me understand why anybody feels compelled to leave because of something they made a choice to get into. If you can't handle it or don't like it, stick to other topics and forums.

    IS this really so complicated an idea?

    I do not have any fears of TF "dying". We have over 2,000 members, 100s of very active members and are getting new ones all the time. People leave for many reasons...interests change, they get boyfriends or girlfriends, they move, their computer dies, they find another hobby. We miss the members who go (well, most of them), but there will always be lots of really cool, interesting new members to take their place.

    There is an ebb and flow to the forums. I have great faith in the levelheadedness of the vast majority of the membership here who knows how to conduct themselves as intelligent and respectful human beings while participating in a wide variety of topics most of which is about CPs.



    "Fox terriers are born with about four times as much original sin in them as other dogs." - Jerome K. Jerome

  5. #13
    BoooOOOOooooo!!!!! unknownclown's Avatar
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    AMEN SISTA!!!
    I am the weirdo who sits next to you on the bus!

  6. #14

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    hallelujah?
    They say if you play a Microsoft CD backwards, you hear satanic messages. Thats nothing, cause if you play it forwards, it installs Windows.

  7. #15

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    Amen, Mista Sista!
    45 yrs. growin\'
    Founder NASC

  8. #16
    apple rings.. what more can i say? FlytrapGurl's Avatar
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    I know there aren't supposed to be arguments. But we are human beings. You can't prevent fights. Anywhere there's a congregation of humans, there WILL eventually be an argument. And I don't know if I speak for everyone here or not, but sometimes I can't help getting involved in argument-prone discussions due to some weird need to make sure where I stand on the subject is known. Sometimes people don't really want to get involved, but they can't help it.

    Quote Originally Posted by [b
    Quote[/b] ]I do not have any fears of TF "dying". We have over 2,000 members, 100s of very active members and are getting new ones all the time. People leave for many reasons...interests change, they get boyfriends or girlfriends, they move, their computer dies, they find another hobby. We miss the members who go (well, most of them), but there will always be lots of really cool, interesting new members to take their place.
    That's exactly how it was going at the forum I mentioned. Then it went downhill. With all due respect, PAK, you weren't there. I was and I saw how it all played out, and it started the same way as TF, very healthy and alive, and then it went downhill. I'm not trying to be negative, I'm just stating the truth about what happens to forums. I don't want it to happen either, but denial isn't going to help anyone.

    I understand that different people have different opinions, and I ALWAYS respect other people's opinions. It's when somebody else doesn't respect my opinions that I get into an argument. We ALL need to respect each other's opinions, no matter whether you think it's right or wrong.
    Liquid Plummer
    Warning: Do not reuse the bottle to store beverages.

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