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What do you call those annoying tests....

  • Thread starter jimscott
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jimscott

Tropical Fish Enthusiast
What do you call those annoying tests that employers make you take, with those questions that ask you about theft, lateness, moods, obtuse co-workers, attitudes, etc...?

I hate them! They pigeon-hole me into reponding in ways I don't always agree with. They play games with absolutes and relative and doggone it all.... I aint a perfect person or employee, with a spotless past or thoughts. What are they looking for..... perfect people or just making sure you are a cereal (sic) killer? :crazy:
 
I'm a cereal killer, I killed Snap, Crackle and Pop! lol

Hate those tests too, but can't remember what they're called .. been a number of years since I had to take one.

Like somebody would really select the answer "Reply with rude comments and then tackle to the ground" to the question "What would you do if a fellow employee said something inappropriate to you?"
 
They wanna make sure you're pure on the outside. Just about everyone takes something at some point. But during that test you're supposed to say NO!!! If I go home with a company pen I will bring it back and pay back half my weeks pay to make up for the mistake! I'm sooooo sorry!!!!! haha I guess that's off topic cause I dunno what they're called :p
 
I don't know what they're called either but I remember I had to take one before I got my job too. They're so annoying. I remember the one question was like "You discover an employee has been stealing merchandise of the following value, put a check next to each value that you would fire the employee for." And then below that it said, like 5, 10, 15, or you wouldn't fire them at all. And I put to fire them if it was higher than $5 and the interviewer was like "This is the only question that I wanted to talk to you about. I just wanted you to understand that we have a no tolerance policy for stealing, do you understand?" I was like "Yes, definately." I felt like I was being reprimanded for something I never did! I guess I'm just too nice.

And yeah the other questions never have an answer that you completely agree with. Or they just have absolutely ABSURD questions like.. "Tell me about a time where there was an event where I had to come to someone's rescue in a life or death situation." and all I'm thinking is.. How many teenagers do you know have been in that kind of situation? I mean come on! It's so stupid. Never apply at Target, they have the most absurd questions ever.
 
I'd call them "Big Brother". Trying to catch your Thoughtcrime. Seriously, how can they legally ask that kind of stu-...oh, Patriot Act, right.
 
Those tests were around long before the Patriot Act. It has its flaws, in fact, it's one long collection of flaws, but we can't blame that test on the Patriot Act.
 
I call those tests a pain in the #@%. LOL

As for stealing some companies want you to admit to stealing something small as most people do it at some point in their life. If its less than $10 most companies would not fire you for it especially if its walking home with a company pen. I once met someone who worked HR for an armored truck company and they had a question that asked if you have ever considered robbing a bank or armored truck. If they say no they will not hire them as they believe that they are lying so dont know if they have lied about anything else. A lot of companies are testing you for honesty and thats their main objective with some of their questions.
 
K- I just asked my wife (Lowes admin manager) they're called integrity tests. She says the same questions are asked a few different ways to see if they answer the same way. But that they don't actually review the questions, the computer says if there is an integrity issue or not... Once the computer part of the application is done, a print out is made according to their answers for the interviewer to ask to get more details on an answer. Like if you answer it is okay to steal less than $5 bucks.. the print out would then ask "Give examples of items that are okay to take."
Andrew
 
I think these tests are kind of fun. Of course, not when actually applying for a job or anything like that; but when just messing around. We actually studied these in a research class I took and how they aren't exactly appropriate for research studies (in general). I can't remember some of the hilarious examples we went over in the class, but there are some good ones.

xvart.
 
  • #10
Yeah K-mart has those integrity tests which I fail a lot because my opinion changes as I go through the tests.. AND THE TEST TAKES LIKE AN HOUR TO COMPLETE >_< There's like 20 different questions but worded differently or repeated into like 1000. It's such a pain.

My work seems to be pretty serious about their stealing rules. I've met some of the owners and they're pretty greedy, but I can understand why they enforce those rules. The guy that interviewed me said "Think about this, if they have stolen something, then you can probably guess that they've done it before and will do it again, you just might not have caught them or won't catch them the next time. Thinking this way makes the value of the stolen items irrelevant since what they've probably actually stolen is incalculable." It's kinda unfair but there's a simple solution... DON'T STEAL.
 
  • #11
I don't trust a scantron to tell me what my integrity is :)

Why not just fill in the answers it wants lol. It's like those stupid drug/alcohol/nicotine surveys they gave in school. You don't answer honestly you just fill in the right answers. Or if you are are in the mood to lower the statistics, you fill in all the wrong answers since it's all anonymous anyway.
 
  • #12
they had these kind of twisted/misleading/weird questions on my permit test...which i failed by 1 point. it was simple things. i just can comprehend and sort out what the question is trying to ask.
Alex

EDIT: JLAP: we use Scantrons for most of our tests taken at school for classes. we take those drug surveys annually too. you can fill in whatever you want...but one of the "drugs" onm ther is Derbisol which...is a fake drug. if you but anything other than youve never heard of it ect they will completly negate your answers...kinda funny really :D
A;ex
 
  • #13
Why not just fill in the answers it wants lol. It's like those stupid drug/alcohol/nicotine surveys they gave in school. You don't answer honestly you just fill in the right answers. Or if you are are in the mood to lower the statistics, you fill in all the wrong answers since it's all anonymous anyway.

Karma man, karma. Someday if you are every working on a dissertation or research paper and you need some college students or some population of people to fill out surveys you will have a hard time getting people since you denied so many people! lol. That's what we would always joke about in class.

xvart.
 
  • #14
I tried to just "fill in the right answers" but it's hard to remember what you considered to be the right answer for EVERY single one. So then I tried to answer them honestly and what I considered to be honest changed as well. So.. yeah I hate those tests. >_> You have to like write down your answers and make sure you don't mess up.
 
  • #15
http://www.expertrating.com/quizzes/Honesty-Test.asp

I've never worked so I'm just replacing employer with teacher and applying it to school. I just started, it doesn't look good so far.

Jesus! The average score is 50, and my score of honesty was 12.

The ExpertRating Honesty Test score indicates that to you, honesty is more than just relative, it is a "distant" relative! Forget about being brutally honest, even being honest is not the game plan for you. Your skill at "bending and then mending" the truth to suit yourself is extraordinary. What you should realize is that even though you believe that lying can get you out of trouble, it often puts people in doubt as to whether they can trust you or rely on you. The silver lining on the cloud is that even though your overall honesty is in question, you were at least honest with yourself while taking this test. Maybe that is an indicator of your tendency to be truthful, even if it is only to your own self. Eventually you will have to start being honest. Do not let dishonesty be your defining personality trait. Although this test revealed that you are comfortable with being dishonest in your personal life as well as your workplace, all is not lost. You can still build up a positive image at your workplace by being honest not only to your employer and colleagues but by being honest to your work. Put your best at work and soon people will change their opinion.

It's strange since I have a strong since of honor and making good on deals and actually going out of my way to help people, and sometimes get screwed over on it, but this test was just about honesty and not honor I guess.

That test is crap and based on the questions asked and the result given I do not believe that is an accurate description of me at all. If it was I would have lied about my score to make myself look good.
 
  • #16
I got a 47.

The ExpertRating Honesty Test score indicates that you are a mixed bag as far as honesty is concerned. Your tendency to be dishonest is moderate. While you are not a habitual liar, you are no monument of honesty either. You have well defined set of ethics and can more or less stick to it. Your morality is not hurt with an occasional lie, nor is threatened with a bit of "fudged truth". But what you do know is when and where to hold your ground. For you, what is wrong is as clearly defined as what is right. You generally abide by the values of truthfulness at work and people see you as being reliable. While "borrowing" something without the knowledge of its owner may be unacceptable for you, using a bit of internet at work for your personal use is just and fair to you. But what you must remember is that dishonesty does not always pay. It may be alright to cover up on some mistake with a lie but take care not to fall into the trap too often. Take care not to indulge in lying too often or it would become more of a second nature to you. Just remember the boundaries that you set for yourself and reduce instances of dishonesty as far as possible.

These tests aren't very accurate, with every one I answer I'm thinking. "This test doesn't even KNOW me." I hate lying cuz it's too easy to get caught on it.
 
  • #18
Curious, I got 87.
 
  • #19
87?! Wow. o.o

I wonder what description it gives you for that, lol.
 
  • #20
Goody two shoes.
 
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