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Inspired by maehem.....

  • Thread starter jimscott
  • Start date

jimscott

Tropical Fish Enthusiast
Are you a girl or a woman? At what age do you feel like being referred to as a girl or a woman?

When I was a kid, I used to think that a perosn turned into an adult at age 21, kinda like metamorphosis. Then I turned 21 and nothing happened. Now that I'm older, I am still waiting for this feeling of adult / maturity to kick in. It hasn't.

This was inspired by Maehem calling herself girl.
 
Scott,
I know what you are saying about feeling like an adult. I sure do not.
I would think that you would with having childern. That's a lot of responsibility, which is why my wife and I do not have any. We are both still kids, that just happen to be married almost 9 years now.
 
I didnt feel like an adult at 21..not even close..
I was still in college and didnt "feel" like an adult at all..
it still didnt happen for all of my 20's either..
through my 20's I was still single, didnt have any great job that I could consider a "career"..was in a Rock & Roll band..still going out to bars every weekend..was basically living the "college lifestyle" right up until I turned 30..
I never felt like an adult.
I think the 20's is basically an extended adolescence nowdays..
its not that I didnt *want* to grow up..I wasnt avoiding anything..I wanted a real job and serious relationship and maybe marriage! ;)
but it just wasnt happening then..it was "just life"..not anything I was doing on purpose..

im now 36, I have a good job, and im getting married this year!
and finally I consider myself an adult.
I "feel" like an adult now..
I cant pinpoint exactly when it happened..it happened gradually over the last 5 years or so..

(yes I know, this thread is supposed to be for the women/girls!
but a guy started it, so I thought I would jump in! ;)

Scot
 
Here's a little secret for the younger folks...

You NEVER feel "grown up" or "adult."  While you may add to your "knowledge bank" via life experiences as you age, you are still "you."  You might change an opinion or develop a new skill, but in your mind, you remain pretty much the same. That's why its hard when kids look at adults as being so different. We aren't really...just lived longer and know a little bit more. We might be a bit wiser due to the experiences we've had in life. Adults often do know what they are talking about when they make "silly" rules. But mentally, I don't think anyone feels more "adult" or "older" in their head.  And its reaaaally hard when the body starts to change and you say "WAIT!  That's not me!!"  Mind and body begin to be mis-matched.  Its tough.  
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I prefer to be referred to as a "woman" but frequently out of habit and what I hear all the time, I'll say "girl."  But long ago my politically correct, feminist roommate corrected me when I called a young woman a girl.  
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 So I do try not to do that.
 
lol! "Inspired by maehem" there is just something odd about that phrase....

On the topic of adulthood... nope... not there yet. To quote my uncle "I am much to old to grow up now!"

It feels like just last week I was 4 years old... now I have a 4 year old of my own! I remember playing with blocks and finger painting like it happened only about 5 minutes ago... okay... so it was last week but still! (being a parent can be SOOOOO much fun!)

As for the whole girl/woman thing.... Kate works just fine!
 
[b said:
Quote[/b] ] think the 20's is basically an extended adolescence nowdays..



Exactly right. Past pressures that may have accellerated the process of maturity are defunct. Lets see, as teens most of us dont have to help out dad in his job or do lots of work starting at 10 or 12 like it used to ne a centuary ago, but the ae at wich one has been coniderd 'mature' has remained pretty much static. Many adults in their 20's now may still rely on their parents for financial aid or have trouble 'sticking with' a job, always looking for the ideal job and not setling for anything less. This try it and see if you like it attaitde os fine, but it does take time, and usually you always start out at or near the bottom of the ladder every time you swich, wich may not keep up with living expenses. I dont feel mature unles si look back on the past year or so to see how much iv matured and knowing what i "would have done" just a few months ago is different from now.
 
Whenever people refer to me as a "man" I always think they're talking about someone else. Of course "boy" doesn't work either... so I'm sticking with "guy" for now.
 
Heh. I'm 31, married with a kid.
Don't feel like an adult. I feel the same way as I felt coming home from school with homework....Chores to do, but I just wanna play. Blah.

Anyway, no one, in my book, can consider themselves a man or a woman (promotion from boy or girl) until they stop insisting on being called one.

We used to get in so much trouble with the chick at college if the word girl slipped out when they were around. That's why we kept calling them girls!
 
I think it must depend on how much life experience you have had (situations you have been in, finding yourself (If you beleive in that), knowing what you would do in any situation, etc.). I guess that would be called emotional age of which I would be much older then my physical age, but I will not go into that.
 
  • #10
i beleive the best mesure of progress isnt where you are, but how far you've come in (?) amount of time
 
  • #11
I never know what to call a female type person between 18 & 20-something. Actually, I avoid using girl or woman altogether. I just say, 'gal".

I absolutely hate it when someone calls me, "Mr. Straus". That just grates me! I mean, it's like they MUST be talking to my father or something. It sure aint me!
 
  • #12
Well, I played dodgeball &basketball yesterday, and I feel like an old man now...
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Peter
 
  • #13
LOL second on what Rubra said, only I just did a lot of stupid things which ended up with lots of painful convalescence, so my body feels like 60, my I.D. says I'm 32 and my personality makes me seem about 14... My "wife" finds it funny that I can have heavy, even heated political discussions with buddies while I'm setting up my Star Wars figures in goofy poses on our coffee table (come to think of it, that IS kinda strange, image-wise)

And what Jimscott said, people call me "Mr.Fuller" and it actually makes me laugh (best quote EVER involving that, some telemarlketer who figured out I was goofing on him and decided to use his BIG GUNS while trying to convince me to subscribe to all these lousy periodicals... "Mr.Fuller- are you saying that you're AFRAID of Magazines
confused.gif
?" I nearly choked to death laughing as the strangled sounds of desperate attempts at maintaining composure filled the earpiece)

And when some 17 year old kid at a store (or wherever, you know the situation) calls me "Sir" it makes me embarassed for both me and them (I always want to make some comment, but then I think of some jerk who insists on being treated like some kind of freakin dignitary FLIPPING out on the kid for even hinting at colloquialisms when addressing them and just think "prolly safer to just say Sir all the time, unfortunately")

And I forget who said it, but that line "I'm wayy too old to grow up now" is PERFECT... I will be using that from now on
 
  • #14
So let me see if I have this right.. so far the consensus from the chronological adults on this forum is that adulthood is an undefined state that we occasionally fumble our way through all the while trying to figure out how to get out of it so we can go play?
 
  • #15
I think you must be right
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  • #16
[b said:
Quote[/b] (Maehem @ May 07 2005,12:34)]So let me see if I have this right.. so far the  consensus from the chronological adults on this forum is that adulthood is an undefined state that we occasionally fumble our way through all the while trying to figure out how to get out of it so we can go play?
That scares me because when I was a kid, I thought theadults knew what they were doing. Were they just faking it well?
 
  • #17
[b said:
Quote[/b] (jimscott @ May 07 2005,6:22)]
[b said:
Quote[/b] (Maehem @ May 07 2005,12:34)]So let me see if I have this right.. so far the  consensus from the chronological adults on this forum is that adulthood is an undefined state that we occasionally fumble our way through all the while trying to figure out how to get out of it so we can go play?
That scares me because when I was a kid, I thought theadults knew what they were doing. Were they just faking it well?
hmmm, are you sure you want the answer to that? lol
 
  • #18
I'm also not a kid, not an adult, just a guy.
It's strange enough for me that i'm a junior in highschool. I remember being a kid and thinking 16 was like all grown up and mature and all high and mighty.
lol.
 
  • #19
I'm still in shock from the first time someone refered to me as "Sir"! I finally decided he must be talking to me
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. I'm still not used to it.
smile_m_32.gif
 
  • #20
Yeah, respect is nice, but I'd be happy to hear sir & mister in a while from now...say... 40 more years!
 
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